Apologies to Berke Breathed for the subject line.
Hey there, how are you all this fine evening, my loyal droogs? Myself, I am in tip-top condition, and quite energetic. I did have it in mind to rant on the Palestinian situation, but I think I’ll spare you all the polemic for this evening. I’m thinking of drafting a lengthy editorial about it, though, so when I do, you can expect to see it here first.
I managed to get 1⁄4 of the way through producing a study guide for my World War II test. As the test is on Tuesday, you can guess what I’ll be working on to-morrow night as well! *grin* I’m not writing anything out for the essay questions, but I am going over them in my noggin. I’ve just come up with my answer for the first choice, and it’s really quite good–I hope she picks that one!
After Tuesday’s exam, I go back into writing mode. The draft of my existential review is due on Friday, and I’m only half-done. Still, I know what I want to say, I just need to get sufficiently inspired and tear into it. My next step is to tear apart Kundera’s usage of Nietzsche’s eternal recurrence: it is absolutely wrong. Since it’s the foundation for his lightness-heaviness polarity, I have just cast a brick through the window of a very beautiful novel. Huh. Oh, well. I wonder if anyone else who’s reviewed the book has attacked his use of Nietzsche… it would be interesting to see what literary critics would have to say about my reading. I am, after all, just a simple historian, and not an English major! *grin*
In other news…
I have recently determined that poodles are evil. More specifically, the toy poodle, which is clearly a work of unspeakable darkness. Recent scientific and archaeological research conducted by Halliburton, inc., has proven beyond all doubt that the poodle was designed to be used as a tool of Lucifer, in his eternal battle for the souls of helpless old ladies, mentally-retarded youngsters, and gay Frenchmen. I hereby single out this wretched beast for swift and mercilous destruction by issuing the following royal edict (on my authority as 42nd earl of Neutopia, and acting regent for the crown):
1. No citizen of Neutopia is to have any dealings, whether financial, social, or sexual, with a representative of the evil race commonly referred to as “poodle.”
2. Any citizen caught fraternizing with such vermin will be forcibly sterilized and sent to the spice mines of Kessel; do not pass “Go,” do not collect $200. There are no exceptions, and ignorance of the law is no excuse.
3. “Poodles” are hereby declared persona non grata and are to be expelled from Neutopian territory immediately, with all applicable force. The use of “Louisville Sluggers” is highly recommended as a means of subduing the spiteful creatures prior to transport.
4. Any citizen that knowingly aids in the efforts of a “poodle” to evade detection by the authorities and to remain within Neutopia, will face a para-military firing squad comprised of near-sighted mariachi musicians, without benefit of a blindfold and cigarette, or even dark sunglasses.
5. Any “poodles” remaining in sovereign Neutopian territory beyond 1 May 2004, are to be defenestrated by the nearest citizen. Defenestration should not be attempted in buildings smaller than three storeys, and must not be done on the ground floor. If a suitable structure is unavailable, please contact the proper authorities for instructions in alternate methods of disposal.
6. Finally, all citizens of the sub-species “felis domesticus” are authorised to attack and consume the remaining “poodles” at will. No citizen is to interfere in the right of “felis domesticus” to devour “poodles,” even if they decide to do so atop your favourite oriental carpet while you’re serving tea to Aunt Millie from Cleveland.
Thank you for your support, and remember to say “Nope” to “Dope” and “Ugh” to “Drugs.” Only you can prevent forest fires. And don’t tell anyone where I touched you, it’ll be our little secret.
“If you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there.” -Lewis Carroll